After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
