Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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