I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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