I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Green mimosas i think yes
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
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How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
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I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize