can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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