Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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