my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It's shark week go big or go home
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
