you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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