She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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