I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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