just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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