I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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