don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
