All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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