party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
