Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
