My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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