Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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