i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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