Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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