tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
