so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
