gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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