Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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