I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
