its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
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