Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
