i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
