I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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