so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
