First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Two words: nipple clamps
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