I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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