do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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