Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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