just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
This toilet bowl is my home.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
