We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Tornado booty call.. dedication
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
