He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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