I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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