jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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