Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
