Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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