when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize