I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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