How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize