omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
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