Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Randomize
