Dual....:-)
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
