Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him