hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
