Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
